Mutant Chronicles

You know you're up shit creek when you have Ron Perlman in the starring role.
Now don't get me wrong, Perlman is one of my film heroes. Whenever there's a film with him in it I know it's going to be awesome - even if it's in a bad way.
Mutant Chronicles takes the cake.
There are "bad but so good" films, and there are "no seriously shithouse" bad films. Mutant Chronicles is of the latter.
Going for $6.98 at JB Hi-Fi Coffs Harbour I shouldn't have been surprised, and I remember mentioning at the time it was going to be bad but I was still keen. 
But just how bad wasn't a reality until I sat through it.
The budget must've been sent on swords, green screen and software, as the severely lacked in every other department. The only relatively good part of the film was the idea behind the plot.
Mutant Chronicles is set in 2707 after humans have exhausted the Earth's natural resources. The human population split into five corporation-led factions who fight over whatever is left. Now, there was an ancient battle between humans and mutants which the humans won, sealing the mutants beneath the surface of the planet. That gets us to the start.
You can predict what happens.
Two warring factions are fighting somewhere (they never say) and reopen the seal, releasing the mutants who then over-run human settlements. A "fellowship" of human representatives from each faction go down to the mutant stronghold where they seek to shut down the machine which is turning captured humans into the mutants.
The script is terrible, with too many poorly executed, non-funny jokes, while the representation of blood is comical. It's as if they've added it in paint on a Windows Me computer or something, it's terrible.
I love a bad film every now and again, and I usually get a ripper of a laugh out of them, but you'd probably want to avoid Mutant Chronicles like the plague.

Thank Christ the film only went 105 minutes instead of the 200+ it had advertised on the cover.

Mutant Chronicles: 111 minutes (2008)